Saturday, March 25, 2017

Dear Reader's Digest, we expect better.

Came across this article today in the morning and since it was from a subscribed page of Reader’s Digest, I clicked on it. With the morning blurriness still in my eyes, I quickly scanned through it. Some things hit my brain, but my sluggishness did not believe my eyes. And this was just the different headings of the article. I scrolled back up to read it carefully because sometimes I’m too quick to form an opinion. I usually read something three times in order to take an action about it, in this case writing about it.

So here are the points that they shared and my opinion on them. And I’m sure you guys would also have some opinions and I’m open to feedback in case you think I have got it all wrong and did not understand the article at all.

13 Things Scientifically Proven to Make You More Attractive Maybe she's born with it, as the commercial goes, or maybe it's these other factors super-sizing attractiveness.

Smile more if you're female

So of course being Reader’s Digest they have stated data, statistics and studies that prove it. Now my point is out of all the millions of studies in thousands of universities, why would you choose this one. Smiling makes women look friendly and "sexually receptive" (in other words, more interested in having sex). "Evolutionarily, men have been programmed to seek out women who will be receptive to their advances," Dr. Beall says.
Umm.. that sounds wrong to me at so many different levels and suddenly brings so many things in perspective. That’s why when women smile it is considered an acceptance at various levels. Thank you Dr. Beall for explaining this to us. For men Smile= Let’s do it. I think some men might even take offence to that statement. And Ladies, keep that smile coming and if you don’t have a reason, find more scientific reasons to smile in the same article. But remember it makes you more attractive to the men’s subconscious. And also I ask a question to men, really think about it deeply and share that when a woman smiles, does your brain immediately imagine her in bed and as a future good mother?

Wear red

What are some associations we have with the color red? Passion, roses, heat, For this very reason, science has shown that wearing red is one way how to look more attractive.
Red is also associated with Bull fighting and a fine cloth is used to attract the bull. However, studies have also shown that Bulls are colour-blind and react more towards the moving of the cloth than the colour. And Oh! It irritates the hell out of them. So much that they want to charge at it and kill whatever started that nonsense. I don’t particularly wear red clothes and I know a lot of my friends who were perfectly able to attract other heterosexual men and get attracted to other colours of men wearing different colours of clothes. So men, here is a question for you if a woman was wearing red means Charge??

Don't play hard to get

What does that even mean? The article states it like everyone has an absolute understanding of the phrase. When you read this point, Women might think they appear more attractive if they keep their partner guessing as to how they really feel—and some research does support this (one study from China found that playing hard to get kept men's interest only after they had chosen a prospective partner). But a more recent study from Germany suggests that people are more likely to rate others as attractive if they can easily understand the emotions they're displaying. The reason for this is in the brain: How well the study participants could decode the other's "neural vocabulary."
Really this article opens up our eyes to realities and dimensions we did know existed.

Speak in a higher pitched voice for women, lower for men

Ladies, think that smoky voice sounds sexy? You might want to think again. Research from the U.K. has found that a higher-pitched voice in women is more attractive to men—and vice versa, that a lower-pitched voice in men is more attractive to women.
I really like this one. Well I know men who have high pitched voice and women who have “smoky voice”. Believe me when everyone is badly hungover, no one wants a high pitched voice men or women. "Gender dimorphic—in other words, typically feminine—qualities such as these have been shown to increase men's sexual attraction to women." The opposite would hold true for women, who evolutionarily seek out male mates who are larger in size, signaled by a low voice. Wow Dr.Beall you showed us the light again.
You have a voice and why should there be a stereotype around that to attract people is something I don’t understand. It sounds quite sexist to me, to be very honest but hey, I’m strongly opinionated.

Have a sense of humor

"He makes me laugh," is one of the reasons women often say they find their mate attractive. A sense of humor in a man has been scientifically proven to draw the attention of women. "Studies have found that both women and men list 'a sense of humor' as a highly desirable trait in a potential romantic partner," Dr. Beall says. "But other studies have found that only women actually rate a funnier man as more desirable—women's desirability was less affected by how funny they actually were." This means women want men who make them laugh, but men want women to laugh at their jokes.
Well, humour makes the world a better place. Who doesn’t like a person who can make them laugh. I’m close to most of my friends because we have a sense of humour. We are not attracted to people all the time simply because they are funny, sometimes it’s annoying. Isn’t it a personal preference than a generalized one?

Get a dog

Pets are instant conversation-starters, and who doesn't love a cute puppy? So it's not surprising that researchers from France found that women were three times more likely to give their number to a dude with a dog as one without. Evolutionarily, "women tend to allocate more resources to child rearing, while men devote more time and energy to mating," Hal Herzog, PhD, a psychology professor at West Carolina University and an expert in human-animal interactions, wrote on Psychology Today. So, "women should be more sensitive than men to how their dates treat their own dogs and cats. Men, on the other hand, should be more likely to use their pets to attract sexual partners." According to a survey from the University of Nevada, half of the women judged a date based on how he treated his pet, and 35 percent said they were more attracted to a man who owned a pet. Twenty-two percent of men said they had used their pet to attract a mate. Hence, the popularity of the Instagram account Hot Dudes With Dogs! Here's how your dog can tell when someone's being rude.
This one I personally found irresponsible. And I vehemently disagree. Please DO NOT get a dog for any other reason but to get a dog. The study tells you statistics but it does not mean you have to get a dog because you want to be attractive to someone.

Be kind

Believe me being kind will attract all sorts of things towards you. Animals, humans, plants, everything. Everyone is kind and we feel for things and issues that move us. And yes of course, we all have our own perception of beauty and that extends to internal beauty as well. So their point is that being kind will attract the opposite sex- but that’s too limited a perception.

Groom yourself

Yes, Groom yourself or not because what you want to. Not because there are certain criterias to be met socially. Women in Victorian period did not take baths for days as that was the trend and many had major skin diseases because of that. How did that work or didn’t? And of course you can Find ou 15 ways to get gorgeous overnight. right there.

Stop stressing

Just like how smiling and displaying kindness make you more attractive, showing signs of stress, like bags under your eyes or dull skin, makes you less attractive. And not just because stress tends to show up on our faces—somehow, others can sense that it's part of a weakened immune system.
Now being under stress is more stressful for others clearly because they just cannot deal with my weak immune system that shows bags under eyes. And of course if I have stress in my life, the other gender will not be interested because that makes me unattractive. Please can you not see that you add stress to people’s life by making such frivolous statements like that. Show concern and write a different article or even better don’t add this point from this point of view.

Grow a beard

Biologically, heterosexuals look for typically male or female traits in the opposite sex—the most glaring of which for women is men's facial hair. "The research indicates some sex-specific characteristics are attractive—particularly those that highlight differences between males and females," Dr. Nicholson says. "For example, different styles of facial stubble and beards can signal a man's masculinity." A recent study from Australia found that women considered men with heavily stubble the most attractive—but interestingly, rated men with full beards as the highest for parenting ability and healthiness. Although a beard's connection with health seems random, it actually may be true: Beards are able to block the sun's rays, so they might protect against skin cancer. They may also keep dust and pollen from entering the airway. And as for being a good dad, a beard might indicate that a male is sexually mature and ready to reproduce.
Guys with beard you are only attractive because you can become a good father and you may be safe from skin cancer, the might facial hair.

Show off your curves

Women tend to think men prefer thin figures—but the opposite might actually be true. According to research, men prefer a waist-to-hips ratio of 7:10, which means you're fairly curvy and have "good childbearing hips." Biologically, men might be onto something: Women with this waist-to-hip ratio have been shown to have optimal levels of estrogen, and are less prone to cardiovascular disease and diabetes. You can play up your hips by walking with a "swaying gait"—researchers at Texas A&M University found that this swinging motion was seen to be extra-feminine to men. "High heels can accentuate women's feminine characteristics as well," Dr. Nicholson says, so if you really want to exaggerate your swinging walk, science says to wear heels. Read how science has found the sexiest possible dance moves.

What if I live in a country where I’m only able to go out in a Burqa, would this point or article still apply to me?

Don't wear too much makeup

 Subbotina Anna/Shutterstock This one seems a bit counter intuitive: Aren't red lips a draw for men? Yes, but only to a degree—in fact, women think men like a lot more makeup than they actually do, according to a U.K. study. "Women tailor their cosmetics use to an inaccurate perception of others' preferences," the study authors wrote. Another study also showed that the amount of makeup women wear can impact others' impressions. "Faces with natural makeup were seen favorably but faces with more dramatic makeup were seen as less trustworthy," study author Nancy Etcoff, PhD, a research psychologist at Massachusetts General Hospital, says. But, she also says women don't wear makeup just to please men; they wear it because it makes them feel more confident—which may be another way how to be more attractive. Here are easy beauty tips lazy girls will appreciate.
Wearing make up or not is my prerogative of my expression. What people think of my make up is not my concern and I definitely do not wear make up to please and seduce men. Taking a queue from Mallika Dua, I would say “It is not about the make ups but the fuck ups”

Hang out with friends

 William Perugini/Shutterstock Due to the "cheerleader effect" (coined by How I Met Your Mother's Barney Stinson) people appear more attractive when they're in a group. But Barney's observation is actually based in science. Research from the University of California showed that study participants rated pictures of people in a group as more attractive than people alone. This is because we tend to "average out" faces in a group, making less attractive members more so. But why would we want an average face? "Typical or average facial features have been shown to be initially attractive and appealing to potential partners," Dr. Nicholson says. A study from Spain showed that men actually prefer women with facial "averageness"—how closely the size, color, and shapes of face resembles other faces in a population. Averageness is thought to be more attractive because it indicates a diverse gene pool, which would lead to healthy offspring. Avoid these nine dating mistakes if you're over 40.

I’m quite speechless by the end of this article. I expected better from Reader’s Digest. Hanging out with your friends is about your time with them and not about attracting others.

You are attractive whether you are walking in a burqa and no one can see you, whether you are reading a book alone at a bar and not hanging with friends wearing a not red dress, whether you are smiling or shouting angrily, whether you have a beard or a dog. You are beautiful in your stress and your in your pyjamas. And being kind attracts the universe. So all in all I would say we are all doing fairly well without articles like these telling us what to do.